All I wanted was a phone call, where you would say sorry. Where I would forgive you, and everything would be okay again. Maybe even a long text that you took your own time typing, so I can read it over and over again. All I wanted was a least a hug, or at least something to make me smile like I used to. I wanted something as straight-forwarding and idealistic as what I gave to you.
Especially that damn letter I had the guts to write to you. You promised you would be there for me, no matter what, that I would be the "little sister" you've always wanted...I guess there are promises you can never seem to keep, right?
All I wanted was a phone call, where we would talk for hours and hours about anything that came to our minds. Maybe even a knock on my door, where you would stop by and just say hi. I dreamt where you would come back and realize you're hurting me. Then, my dream would be over and I would see you living your own world with everyone in it but me. I don't see why you called that guy "the enemy" ever since he dumped me, when you hang out with him every day. You didn't want anyone to hurt me and make my life miserable. Look at you now. Yet, you get mad at me for hanging out with her. Why do you? She was my friend way before you two got closer. Besides, the closer me and her get, the more I began to realize why ever she stopped having feelings for you.
All I needed was a fucking phone call, or possible anything at all! Where I can hear your voice again, where I can be happy again...As you can see, I haven't gotten anything except pain and the lack of your passionate charm. I gave you a shoulder to cry on, I was your guardian angel sent to help you but never me. All I needed was a phone call, but I was too shy. So now, I'm only giving you a reason to say goodbye.
Here I am, screaming at the world, crying on the floor, waiting for my phone to ring. Waiting for your name to show up the screen, where my eyes will brighten, Even if the phone's volume is up full blast, I never hear a ring. All I hear are knocks on my door, from some of my friends, even my siblings. They keep saying you're never going to show up, that you're never going to call. I made a vow that the only thing I would listen to is the ring of the call that will never show up.
But, one day you'll be the one waiting for my call. You will be begging for me to come back to your life. One Day I will forget about you. One Day.
It just makes me feel like shit when I realize today isn't the day. It will be very soon, I just have to wait. That's it.
Love,
A.
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