The Zombie Inside Of Me

This morning was really a complete blur. I just remember me running and vomiting  in the bathroom. I thought for a second that I needed a exorcist or something. I couldn't just be sick like that! But, I begin to realize the familiar feeling in my throat and my stressed-out mind. I wasn't dying or sick. I was just sick out of mind. Both of my disorders were coming back to haunt me and bite me in the butt.

They aren't that bad, I just get really affected by them. If I continue being like this, I will start to get used to it, as if it's how I live. Just like the living dead :my mind will turn into a ticking bomb ready to explode, and my numb body will get used to all the pain from everything including myself. Plus, the toilet will become my new best friend.

I have been a zombie  before, and it sucks. The agony brings you down until someday, you give up.

I don't want to be like that ever again, it just makes everything about my life even worse.  So, I decided to skip school today! I spent all day either 1.sleeping or 2...that's about it, just sleeping. I am already planning what I'm going to do when I get back to the realms of hell. I will causally expect everyone to miss me (Ha. I don't think so.). If they ever ask me why I was gone, I will just say I was sick. 

Not "Oh, I just got infected by a bulimic depressed zombie so I needed to be exorcised right away." 

Hm..now that I think about it, maybe I should say that. We will see.

Love,

A.